The new executive officer (or XO in Department of Defense speak) was sitting in the conference room and before the meeting began started thinking out loud, "What would this room look like if it was blue?"
The next day, he was surprised to find that the room had been painted blue. The junior staff had taken the musings as an order, and jumped on it. Perhaps, they were eager to please the new XO by demonstrating how nimble and capable they are.
When you reach a certain level of management, you are expected to lead and everything you say can be taken as an order. When you were among them as a peer, you could think out loud. Your collaboration was taken for granted, or perhaps no one cared what you thought. But now, not only are they listening to you and heeding you, they are also not interrupting you. After all, it is not a good idea to cut off the new boss with "painting the conference room is a waste of resources, and besides blue is an awful color for a conference room.”
The peer group discussion allows for lesser formality where you can interrupt someone without major disrespect. Interruption is a wonderful indicator that others may have opinions too. When you were their peer, silence was a good indicator of the absence of dissension or the presence of indifference. However, protocol dictates you don't interrupt the boss when he is talking. The new XO forgets this when thinking out loud, and may - unconsciously perhaps - mistake deference for consensus.
This leaves a lot of room for you to blunder. You have to be aware of how deference has changed the interaction with you.
What to do:
When you have junior officers and first-line managers in with you, you have to listen more and speak less. Because when you speak, requirements and constraints are heard. Since they won’t stop you, you have to stop you. You have to ask for alternatives and potential issues and then listen to them. If you don’t, many will allow you to boldly travel in ignorance into dangerous corridors.
Another trait to pick up is cues. You can give cues to your audience that distinguish when you are having a debate and when you are making a decision. “what do you think would happen if we did ….?” “How would it turn out if we decided to…?” When you do this you are declaring a brainstorming session. This grants the group permission to speak freely as you work out a problem.
This takes discipline, as you have to consciously shut up. If you are graced with a culture that values respect for the chain of command (when the chain is present) they will not interrupt the boss. This means you have to draw it out, in a way that can be repeated. Then, you have to declare the session over, and make a decision. All those that contributed have to know their input was valued and considered, but the decision is made and everyone is expected to get behind it. If you don’t end the session, it will continue though execution and your effectiveness as a leader will suffer.
Additionally, you can establish, from your senior staff, a trusted circle of advisors where you can safely brainstorm. They can talk back with impunity, stop you from “sucking the air out of the room”, and help others understand your style of communication. They can help craft safe execution of your directives because they have a privileged view of how you process information. They will protect you and help you, because they understand your challenges as well as the peculiar aspects of the staff that support you. But they can only be selected from your senior staff or you will be seen as playing favorites and surrounding yourself with an entourage. Not everyone is blessed with the right mix in senior staff - or any senior staff at all. This invaluable asset should be sought out in every new assignment.
Your trusted circle will keep you out of trouble. Your cues will avoid waste and save you from embarrassing situations. Your ability to listen will build respect and loyalty. But more importantly, you will effectively wield the value of the human resources for which you are accountable.
© Aron Ruthe, 2014
